Let me tell you about an email I get every single week, at least once.

“HELP! My skin is horrible. I am too old for this. Why the hell am I breaking out like a fifteen year old? Why am I oily and dry at the same time? Why does it hurt when I touch my face? I have tried every single product under the sun. Some of them have peeled the top layer of my skin off and left me looking like a red-bottomed baby. Others left me squeaky clean as long as you don’t come to close to me, then I start to break out just from your presence. I’m now on twelve different pills from six different doctors, and my derm says that I’m crazy. He claims he can’t even see any breakouts!! What a jerk. But maybe he’s right? Shit.

Love,

Desperate-but-just-bought-a-clarasonic-before-I-give-up”

Then I go.

“I am so sorry about this! Heartbroken, really. Can you tell me about your diet? And maybe a little bit about the products you use? We WILL get to the bottom of this.”

Then the response. Always my favorite.

“Oops. Well, I drink three lattes every day with skim milk and Splenda. A bagel for breakfast, a slice of pizza for lunch. Lots of wine for… I mean with dinner. I really really love dairy. And sugar. And I can’t even think about vegetables, they make my stomach turn. But pasta is like a vegetable so I’m okay. Oh and I take a multi-vitamin once a week. Ugh fine, once a month. As for products, please go to your nearest CVS and choose an aisle. Throw all of the products in that aisle in your cart. That is my daily routine.”

Okay so maybe it’s not that extreme, but it’s pretty damn close. Come on now ladies. We’re not in high school anymore. I mean I love being here to yell at all of you, and I sort of think that’s why you come to me anyways. But imagine what a difference we could make together if you already quit some of the garbage in your life before you came to me!

Here are the ingredients in Subway bread:

Enriched wheat flour (wheat flour, barley malt, niacin, iron, thiamin mononitrate, riboflavin, folic acid), water, yeast, sugar, contains 2% or less of the following: soybean oil, wheat gluten, salt, dough conditioners (DATEM, sodium stearoyl lactylate, ascorbic acid, potassium iodate, azodicarbonamide), yeast nutrients (calcium carbonate, calcium sulfate, ammonium sulfate), wheat protein isolate, yeast extract, vitamin D2, natural flavor, enzymes

Here are the ingredients in Philosophy’s “Purity” Cleanser (ha, such an appropriate name):

water, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, limnanthes alba (meadowfoam) seed oil, coco-glucoside, peg-120 methyl glucose dioleate, aniba rosaeodora (rosewood) wood oil, geranium maculatum oil, guaiacum officinale, cymbopogon martini oil, rosa damascena extract, amyris balsamifera bark oil, santalum album (sandalwood) oil, salvia officinalis (sage) oil, cinnamomum cassia leaf oil, anthemis nobilis flower oil, daucus carota sativa (carrot) seed oil, piper nigrum (black pepper) seed extract, sodium trideceth sulfate, hexylene glycol, cocos nucifera (coconut) alcohol, polysorbate 20, glycerin, carbomer, triethanolamine, methylparaben, propylparaben, imidazolidinyl urea, fd&c yellow no.5

And those are nowhere near the only two things going into or onto your body every day. OF COURSE your skin is having problems! God bless it for even working this hard for you. It’s a wonder we don’t all just drop dead.

So my plea to you is just this: please acknowledge that before you ever email me, you know exactly what I’m going to say. You are allowing too much shit into your life. Get rid of any of it, and you will feel better. Once you know that, we can really kick ass and get you practically perfect skin.

"Within the first week I noticed that my skin was considerably softer. By week two, the ingrown hairs on my legs started to disappear. And by week three, I was starting to think that my baby soft skin was a figment of my imagination, as there was no way this scrub could make my body that smooth. But this past weekend, while I was in a crowded subway car, a cute guy brushed up against my arm and said, "Holy sh*t your skin is soft." So there you have it, it’s hot-boy approved."

Read more on the Huffington Post Style section [HERE]. 

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Certifiably Awesome: Hayley Williams of Paramore

Obsessed with Hayley Williams of Paramore? Us, too! That’s why we’re starting off our newest feature, S Dub’s Certifiably Awesome Series, with this bad ass and inspirational chick.
We sat down with Hayley and asked her 5 fun and unexpected questions that you definitely won’t see anywhere else. Read on to see what’s up!
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1. What is your favorite food that is PC aka healthy?
- Kale salad with strawberries and avocados. Plain ol’ baked sweet potatoes. Oh! and Veggie Tom Kha Gai soup with brown rice. 
2. What is your fave food that a health magazine would tell you not to eat?
- Banana Pudding. Mac and Cheese. Sweet Tea. Buttermilk biscuits. Grilled cheese sandwiches. I’m a southern fried female, through and through. Also, I confess to buying peanut M&M’s like every time I go to a movie, which is a lot.
3. What is a skincare myth that you have busted on your own?
- That putting oil on your face will make you breakout. I’m super sensitive and acne-prone and my favorite makeup brand is RMS. Their products have lots of good, organic, pure oils in them and I swear not only do they NOT break me out but they actually make my skin look and feel better. 
4. What percent natural are you?
- Hmm, I’m gonna say about 70 or 75%. I have a habit of buying drugstore eyeshadows and lipstains. Oh and I still use fancy brand perfumes. They’re like some feminine fantasy for me. I feel like they keep me from turning into a boy on tour. My next move is to find a really nice natural one that sticks with me all day… and also keeps me from turning into a boy.
5. What is your naked animal? (Oh you don’t know what this is? Allow us to improve your life tremendously. IF posing for naked photos, what animal would you choose to hide your girly parts?)
- This just became the greatest interview of all time. I’m fairly certain that this is my “naked” animal. Which ironically, wears a bonnet. That’s just the sort of lady I am. 
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And because we’re so obsessed with Hayley, we’re also giving 50% off of our organic lip balm flights [HERE]. It only lasts for 24 hours so get it now!

Let’s be honest… no one is looking that fresh faced in this heat but you can beat it by making this super simple facial spritzer that combines bright notes of grapefruit with the soft fresh scent of rosewater.

And while you’re at it, treat that booty to a coffee body scrub that’ll tighten your cheeks and make cellulite not seem so “cellulite-y”.

Click the pic or find the recipe over at [Rue Magazine].